THE BASKETBALL CENTER (AP) - Is there trouble brewing for one of the favorites to take the League III.11 championship this year? With a roster sporting future Ashkickers Hall-of-Famer Mieczysław Wawrzyniak and current MVP, Poobalan Motsoaledi, the almost-consensus favorites to win the Great 8 this year already have just one loss less than their entire total loss count last year.
What is going on?
When asked for an interview following the Ashkickers' embarrassing loss against the Lakeview Wolves, Mr. Tylormade refused to comment, and was reported to have ran up a 50K tab at Magic City Gentleman's Club. Misty Rains, an employee, stated that Mr. Tylormade was "very sad" and "needed companionship" to help him cope with the 0-3 start. After the game, the reigning MVP knocked out ESPN regional reporter Stewart Scoot after he quipped, "How does it feel to be tied with the RambleBalls in the Great 8 cellar?" He lost function in his left eye forever after that shot. Say goodbye to your SportsCenter dream, Stewart.
Anyhow, the schedule does not get any easier for the Ashkickers, or shall we say Ash-kickees, for the foreseeable future. Their pathetic game management and ludicrously terrible game shape will only lead to more punched-out reporters and high strip club bills this season if they don't start playing to their potential.
Their next test is a home game against the MAD THRASHERS. The entire league will be watching. Can they recover from this tailspin, rally the troops, and make a run at the rough-and-tumble Great 8 this year?
The Porcupines, Tiger Sharks, Internet Lovers, and T.G. surely hope not.
Last edited by fury508 at 2/10/2019 2:31:59 PM